The quote that I used for the title of this blog entry was made by Alan Chambers, the president of Exodus International and the author of the book “Leaving Homosexuality: A Practical Guide for Men and Women Looking for a Way Out.” When I first started dealing with my issues with same-sex attraction, my primary goal was to overcome them and develop heterosexual attractions. But more and more I’m seeing that this quote from Chambers is true, and that the focus of my spiritual life needs to be on growing in holiness.
I say this because there has been continued healing in my life with regard to same-sex attraction. Over the past six months or so, I have mostly experienced opposite-sex attraction with a few periods of same-sex attraction. “This is great!” my thinking goes. “Now I can focus on dating and discerning whether marriage is a possibility for me, or I can discern whether God might be calling me to the priesthood.” In my exuberance over my refound heterosexual attractions (I did experience opposite-sex attraction in high school), I open myself up to the desire to entertain these attractions and give in to them when the temptation presents itself. And I’m a sucker for it every time, because as I said I see the development of opposite-sex attractions as being a good thing, which it is. Even my spiritual director said the other day that it was good that I was experiencing problems with heterosexual lust, before he caught himself and realized what he said. But lust is lust, regardless of whether it is geared towards men or women. It’s all sinful, and it’s not part of God’s plan for us. And I reject and renounce it. I’m called, and we’re all called, to love others because they are made in the image and likeness of God. We’re also called to holiness. I accept that call to holiness, as well as that call to love. I know that in answering that I call I will find my fulfillment, and more importantly I will play a part in bringing God’s love to the world.
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